On a summer afternoon many years ago, my wife and I were picking tomatoes in our garden. She noticed that I appeared to be lost in deep thought and asked, “What are you thinking about?” (I had gone into business with a friend a year earlier, the business never took off, and it finally failed. We had around $300 in the bank.) I responded sarcastically to my wife, “Oh, little things like how we are going to pay for groceries and a house payment next month.” Without missing a beat, my wife asked, “What do you want to do, now, with your life?” I told her that I had never enjoyed a job as much as the one I had just had—delivering workshops on various topics to corporate clients. Then my wife astounded me by saying, “Then that’s what we’ll do!” We started a professional development business and quickly procured our first contract! Truth to tell, my wife’s undying belief in me and my abilities has shaped the man I am today.
About a decade later, I found myself working with Lee Hecht Harrison (LHH)—the global, outplacement and career-transition company. I worked full time for a few years, then started my second professional development company, Daily Renaissance. Through my company I have done contract work for LHH for almost two decades now. I have taught and coached hundreds of people.
During my workshops—over many years—I have asked participants who are between jobs, “How many of you are considering doing something completely different from what you have been doing?” The results have remained the same regardless of the demographics of the participants. Consistently, 60% or more of the participants will raise their hands! This may come as a surprise to some, but not to those of us who have worked in career counseling. We have learned that many people enter careers for reasons that don’t provide lasting appeal for them—”I followed my dad into…” “I wanted to make a ton of money.” “I wanted to be the boss.”
Whenever I work one-on-one with a client between jobs, I ask them the wise question my wife posed to me all those years ago, “What do you want to do, now, with your life?” Sadly, I have discovered that many people never factor “want” into their career equation. Instead, they choose factors such as ought, should, or have.
I have watched some incredible career redirections in clients I have worked with when I “gave them permission” (they have said this to me!) to consider what they really “want” to do—what they are really good at and what they love doing! A senior HR Manger became a commercial pilot. A software engineer opened his own restaurant, etc. (I have worked with many who started their own businesses).
The longer I live, the more I am amazed at the power the “right questions” at the right time have in guiding and shaping our lives. And I will be forever grateful for the life-changing question my “better half” (make that 7/8) asked me all those years ago in our tomato garden, “What do you want to do, now, with your life?”